Posted by The Dean of Cincinnati

We all know the City of Cincinnati is on the verge of a budgetary crisis.  That’s why they want to put red-light cameras at downtown intersections—not because they are motivated by safety, but instead because they want to make some money to help pay the bills.  Never mind research that indicates these flashing cameras cause distractions and can increase rear-end collisions where they get installed.  The City needs its money.  But there may be another way to profit off crime to save the budget!

Criminalize jaywalking!

By increasing the fine for jaywalking, the City can secure another revenue stream when seeking to profit off of punishing criminals.  Since jaywalking is a relatively common crime, and since so many have been conditioned to believe it’s not enforced anyway, there will be a steady stream of jaywalkers almost everywhere.  The additional cost for paying these new jaywalk vortex unit officers will easily be swallowed by increased revenue, and the remaining cash can help the City’s budget.

Oh, by the way, this might make the streets more safe, too.

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