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Sunday, October 28, 2007
The Environment: Cussing versus Second-Hand Smoke
Posted by The Dean of Cincinnati
So the other day I took my son to Bellevue Park on Ohio Avenue to play. As we pulled into the parking spot, he was thrilled to see that there were three other children playing—all with their father, who had a van. The family was white. Adjacent to the playground was another parking area, where a large group of black men were standing around, talking very loudly.
What power in that juxtaposition!
The group of black men were having a very animated conversation, punctuated frequently by the exclamation of words like “Shit!” and “Nigga!” and “Muthafucka!”
The other white father kept trying to catch my eye, and invariably I made eye contact with him.
“What a great place to take the kids, huh?” It was like he was waiting to make that comment, because as soon as he made it he started packing his family into the van.
So I found myself thinking about the playground environment. I don’t know if my son is old enough to have even understood the profanity coming from the group of men adjacent to the playground. But I couldn’t help but consider what kind of environment was being created as a result of their boisterous presence.
That is how I came to be considering the idea of healthy environments while watching my son on the playground.
I turned my head and saw the father backing out of the parking spot. His young daughter sat in the front seat, his two sons in the back. I watched as he lit a cigarette, the smoke wasping around the car interior.
I noticed the empty eyes of his daughter, looking longingly at the playground, her long brown locks encircled by smoke like an angel.
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29 Oct 2007 at 11:11 am | #
I realize you didn’t have the opportunity to say anything to the father as he lit his cigarette and drove off. However, I’m curious what you found to say to the group of men that were still there, creating a less than healthy environment for your son.
29 Oct 2007 at 08:23 pm | #
JFD, my take is Dean didn’t say anything to the men who were standing around, cursing.
My curiousity is how is this cigarette smoking father such an ogre, an evil man, when Jeffre’s puttering around the city in an old, decrepit vehicle, polluting the air for many children, along with many of our elderly who have breathing difficulties - allergies, asthma, COPD, heart ailments, etc. That pile of iron Jeffre has would never pass a vehicle enviromental test. So much for the clean air quality & the Green of the city! Talk out one side of the mouth & turn around & do whatever pleases one’s self.
I noticed there was nothing mentioned if the smoking father had a window at least partially down while he had his tobacco.
And one should never, ever, underestimate the powers of a child’s mind or their abilities to mimic wonderful, star role models, such as the scofflaws in the park using inappropriate language in front of children. One day, Dean’s kid is going to get a turd stuck crosswise & he’s going to blurt out, “Sh*t!” “Mutha****er!”
30 Oct 2007 at 10:56 am | #
If you have a problem with Dean’s car, the solution is simple.
By him a new one. And by your standards, you’ll need to invest in a hybrid for him.
Problem solved.
Oh, I’ll need one too.
30 Oct 2007 at 08:35 pm | #
Foul language and smoking are both pollution in my book. I like that park a lot too.
30 Oct 2007 at 09:58 pm | #
No one has a problem with Dean’s car, Deborah. You need to pay attention. I mentioned Jeffre’s gas guzzling campaign bus. If one is going to do the talk, they need to think about doing the walk, rather than shove their ideologies down everyone’s throats.
I’ve made myself perfectly clear.
And as for you needing a car, I suggest you get off your tookus & get a job. That’s right. J-O-B. A
nother thing, you need to wait until your kid has her learner’s permit before allowing her to take the wheel in your presence. You’ll be screaming to racial-police hatred high heaven when you get pulled over. You’ll have no one to blame but yourself. No one else.
31 Oct 2007 at 12:47 am | #
The Clifton Heights Militia would have found something to say.
31 Oct 2007 at 12:23 pm | #
Dean, why do you feel the need to mention what race the people were in your story? Would you have done the same if the guys cussing would have been a race other than black?
31 Oct 2007 at 12:56 pm | #
I was taught that good writing is specific. The father who was killing his children with second hand smoke was white. Why should I not tell you that fact?
31 Oct 2007 at 03:45 pm | #
It’s irrelevant in your story. Simply stating that a father was killing his children with second had smoke gets the point across and the detail about race doesn’t do anything more than bring attention to the color of one’s skin, which I don’t see why you have to do that. And for that matter, why mention that the other guys were black??
31 Oct 2007 at 04:29 pm | #
Been to Virginia Beach lately? They have signs posted. I can’t quite recreate them here but picture something like “&*^$@!” inside the “ghostbusters” symbol—-i.e., “no swearing.”
All placed there by the Xian Coalition to make the vacation spot more family-friendly. Not sure if it worked or not. I suspect not too many families enjoy nightclubs together, but I may be wrong.
(But seriously, VAB is a great place to take the kids during the daytime!)
31 Oct 2007 at 04:34 pm | #
As for gas-guzzling campaign vehicles—-signs and posters and things have a carbon footprint, too. We place far too much blame/responsibility on individual polluters over the much messier corporations. Unless you have your own jet, travel a lot by plane, or recently built a large eco-unfriendly parking lot/golf course/housing development, relax a little!
Anyway, that non-ice-cream truck (Painter) is driving my kids crazy! What a mean trick! “No kids, it’s not the ice cream man, it’s a politician! Sorry, you’re too young to vote!”
31 Oct 2007 at 05:24 pm | #
Poor, poor Jonesy. Nothing better to do than spar with an unemployed, lawbreaker who didn’t even bother too fully read your bitchy little post.
My response:
OK. Get Jeffre a brand new campaign bus. Problem solved.
OK. When it’s mid-January, icy, and snowy, and when she’ll be eligible for her permit, YOU come teach her to drive. Good luck with that.
OK. I’ve got a job.
Anything else?
I guess it’s nice to know you read my blog. Somebody has to. It may as well be you. I guess my question is - why do you think I’ll be embarrassed about things I’ve already written about for the entire planet to see? (Big ups to my people behind the Great Firewall).
I hope I didn’t ruin your “gotcha” moment of the day. You really must try harder but that’s going to be very hard to do. My next blog post will probably be about my age, weight and shoe size. And any woman, as my mother says, who will tell those, will tell anything.
No soup for you.
NEXT! : )
31 Oct 2007 at 06:40 pm | #
You should have omitted this fact because it’s completely irrelevant and has no bearing on your overall question—which is worse: cussing or smoking?
For instance, Good comment: “I’m typing this comment on my computer.”
Bad comment: “I’m typing this comment on a computer I bought at the Apple Store in a mall. The store is next to a Pottery Barn. Pottery Barn sells overpriced furniture to yuppies.”
See how the second comment was full of extraneous information that had no relevance to the subject? Yes, you want to include as much information you can that is relevant. Race was not at all important to this post.
31 Oct 2007 at 09:17 pm | #
Better comment: I’m typing on my MacBook Pro.
You know full well race was relevant here. For many white people (like the smoker), black guys cussing is a “problem.” However, smoking in a closed car with his small children was not a problem, in his view.
I find that ironic. If forced to choose, I would rather my kid have no cancer and a potty mouth.
31 Oct 2007 at 09:52 pm | #
What are you talking about? It sounded like a father wanted to relate to another father about the common aggravation they should both feel at being assaulted with nasty language in a setting that should be child friendly. Period. Since your child’s mom is black, and I’ll guess that maybe he doesn’t look exactly like you, the other father probably picked up that your family is multi-racial. So it would be very unlikely that he was trying to share a white racist moment with you, as you imply. Race had absolutely no relevance in this story except to point out your own racism. Black guys cuss in parks. White guys cuss in parks. White parents smoke in cars with their kids on board. Black parents smoke in cars with their kids on board. I think most people would take from this experience that it’s challenging to find safe and healthy environments to share with your children. But instead you jump right to race and weighing which is worse, black people cussing around kids or white people smoking around kids, when the behaviors are not particular or exclusive to one race or another.
01 Nov 2007 at 07:20 am | #
Yes, and then it was ironic that this father—concerned with environment—lit up a cigarette in a closed car.
Please explain the nature of what you allege is my own racism, and also explain against whom, specifically, I am “racist.”
01 Nov 2007 at 02:12 pm | #
Actually, I don’t, and I still don’t know why you chose to inject the issue. I could easily envision a black man being just as upset about a bunch of guys standing around a playground using bad language around his kids, too.
01 Nov 2007 at 02:36 pm | #
1. The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability and that a particular race is superior to others.
2. Discrimination or prejudice based on race.
You clearly believe that there are inherent differences among the races. And you have an unusual preoccupation with race and see everything in terms of race. Blacks guys cussing. White guys smoking. Not guys cussing. Not guys smoking. And then you run with it and come up with silly, meaningless conclusions like this little tale. It’s odd that you don’t see this because it’s a consistent thread running through much of what you write. I guess you’re too close to it.
Though of course there’s a twist with you. You have a problem with your own race. Always needing to go “hey, see how bad whites are.” Someone smoking and someone cussing would have far less psychic damage on a child than being raised by a parent with such intense focus on race, and not in a good way, not with pride. That will have to rub off and cause shame and self esteem problems.
01 Nov 2007 at 06:30 pm | #
1. I do not believe that race accounts for differences in human character or ability, and I do not believe that a particular race is superior to others.
2. Against whom have I been prejudiced?
I can imagine that, too. It’s just that I have never seen such a thing.
01 Nov 2007 at 07:00 pm | #
You’ve never seen an African-American person express disapproval for offensive language? You’re either ridiculously isolated, ignorant, or lying. Come on man, just turn on the TV any time Bill Cosby’s on and you’ll see an African-American condemning bad language used by young people (black and white, though Cosby’s emphasis is on young black men).
01 Nov 2007 at 07:05 pm | #
Don’t be silly. Of course I have seen black people upset at foul language. I’ve even seen them smoke, too!
But I have never been in a park where a black guy with his kids smoked in a car while complaining about a bunch of cussing white guys speaking very loudly.
Maybe this happens all the time. Who knows?
What’s your point?
01 Nov 2007 at 07:31 pm | #
The point is, race has no relevancy in this discussion. You were an idiot to throw it out there.
01 Nov 2007 at 08:00 pm | #
Hmmm…
Wonder why race is relevant in any of these:
http://www.enquirer.com/editions/2001/07/02/loc_41_shootings_in_10.html
http://www.enquirer.com/editions/2002/05/16/loc_1killings_up_87_over.html
http://www.enquirer.com/editions/2004/11/06/loc_mistrial06.html
http://news.enquirer.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20071015/SPT04/710150382
http://www.enquirer.com/editions/2004/08/13/loc_prostatecancer13.html
http://www.enquirer.com/discipline/disciplineday3main.html
01 Nov 2007 at 09:04 pm | #
That point is so completely nonsensical that it is difficult to respond. Are you honestly saying you don’t see the difference between your inclusion of race in your little diary, and including race in a story about African-Americans being more likely to develop certain types of cancer?
01 Nov 2007 at 09:33 pm | #
I’d like to see what conclusions you draw about the first couple of articles as it relates to race. And race does matter in America, of course. But in the context of your story, it does not. The heroes of your story, the black guys, were certainly free to curse and disrupt everyone’s else’s experience at the park. No cops busting heads. Not even a parent suggesting they tone it down, so try as you may you weren’t able to turn this into an issue of discrimination. And the white guy, always the villain of your stories, didn’t inflict his filthy habit beyond his own family, (apparently he didn’t even smoke outdoors, in the park, sparing you and your son and the cussing dudes) which for now, is not illegal. So again his stray glance and few words didn’t make him a white racist, except in your eyes. Only the Dean would wax poetic about a bunch of foul mouthed punks. I’m sure even they would check that behavior if their kids were around.
01 Nov 2007 at 09:37 pm | #
cincysuz,
Like usual, you are inventing things I did not write, then bitching about them. Straw man argument.
anon #24,
There were six links included. Respond to the other five, and then I will reply.
01 Nov 2007 at 09:48 pm | #
OK, cincysuz, my little darling—I don’t feel like watching TV and I have a few down minutes.
So let’s play the same game on you that you like to inflict upon me.
You are a classist. You are forever fixated on the plight of poor whites, insisting on playing the “poor white girl” card to get pity for your ill-informed perspectives. Since you can’t debate issues logically, you resort to straw man arguments and classist rants.
This is all indicative of your self-loathing. You hate poor people. You have obviously experienced poverty. (See how I used the word “obviously”? I will always use words like that, and “clearly,” when I don’t actually know what I’m talking about, to try and trick the reader with rhetoric! I learned that trick from your comment #18!)
Anyway, your poverty-goggles prevent you from seeing that issues and race and class are intricately intertwined in our culture, but at the same time distinct from one another. These poverty-goggles, combined with your self-loathing, cause you to become enraged when people discuss racism—given your overall inability to handle discussion which authorizes the existence of racialized poverty.
This comes from the overall jealousy you feel towards non-impoverished whites. You know white privilege exists, but you are resentful of the fact that your poor family did not directly benefit from its existence, clearly from some formative experience in your early childhood. This causes you to deny, vehemently, anything that does not validate your own impoverished whiteness.
02 Nov 2007 at 12:46 am | #
I just want to know why the Cincinnati Beacon cares so much about black people? White guys self-appointed as spokesmen for the blacks. Who asked you? Cincinnati has a black newspaper, it’s called the Herald. The Beacon needs a different reason to exist.
To recap: You’re a white guy in a majority white country. Your comments on race are worthless, at best. Furthermore, mention of race in discussions unrelated to race perpetuates the lie that race has a damn thing to do with anything.
In summary: you’re too dumb to discuss the topic. Stop it.
02 Nov 2007 at 07:09 am | #
#28,
You have an interesting collection of comments you left last night.
I suggest you check out this site. Seems right up your alley.
02 Nov 2007 at 01:32 pm | #
Don’t fence me in Pepper should go talk to his mommy. She can fix anything and this little pissant blogger needs to be fixed. Got anything intelligent to say for yourself, David? Your URL is up.
02 Nov 2007 at 03:09 pm | #
YOU: OK, cincysuz, my little darling—I don’t feel like watching TV and I have a few down minutes.
ME: Your time would have been better spent watching The Office, Dean my pet. But okay, it’s on.
YOU: So let’s play the same game on you that you like to inflict upon me.
ME: I’m not usually into S&M, as in inflicting, but I’ll give it a whirl.
YOU: You are a classist. You are forever fixated on the plight of poor whites, insisting on playing the “poor white girl” card to get pity for your ill-informed perspectives. Since you can’t debate issues logically, you resort to straw man arguments and classist rants. This is all indicative of your self-loathing. You hate poor people. You have obviously experienced poverty. (See how I used the word “obviously”? I will always use words like that, and “clearly,” when I don’t actually know what I’m talking about, to try and trick the reader with rhetoric! I learned that trick from your comment #18!)
ME: I’m glad I could teach you something. I’m a little bit confused that even in parody, you would try to prove that I’m a “classist” but pointing out my poverty-stricken background! I guess you mean classist against the rich classes. Right? If so, count me in.
YOU: Anyway, your poverty-goggles prevent you from seeing that issues and race and class are intricately intertwined in our culture, but at the same time distinct from one another. These poverty-goggles, combined with your self-loathing, cause you to become enraged when people discuss racism—given your overall inability to handle discussion which authorizes the existence of racialized poverty.
ME: Poverty goggles. I like that. Do I have your permission to modify it a little to, say, White Guy Privilege Goggles or my personal favorite Filty Rich (Goggles)? So you’re the guy that actually autorizes racialized poverty? It thought that was a political appointment. Yes, it does enrage me that you’ve done that. Racialized poverty is definitely not cool.
YOU: This comes from the overall jealousy you feel towards non-impoverished whites. You know white privilege exists, but you are resentful of the fact that your poor family did not directly benefit from its existence, clearly from some formative experience in your early childhood. This causes you to deny, vehemently, anything that does not validate your own impoverished whiteness.
ME: Now clarify please. Is this jealousy toward you, in particular, as a non-impoverished white? I would say it’s more disdain than jealousy.
I sit here at my fancy eatin’ table, doing my cipherin’ and cursive, keeping an eye out for a possum to club over the head and toss in the pot for supper, and I curse my unsophisticated, hillbilly background that has left me ill-prepared to understand how to italicize and bold letters, in order to make my emphasis more, well, emphatic.
02 Nov 2007 at 04:53 pm | #
Jason, I looked at all the stories you posted. I still don’t know what you’re trying to prove with that post. You are the worst writer I’ve ever read.
02 Nov 2007 at 08:35 pm | #
On the way home from work today, I stopped by the grocery store. I witnessed a black woman parked in the handicapped spot. She had the driver’s side window down maybe 1/2 of the way. I’ll give her that & a bit more. Puffing away on a cigarette. Smoking like a malfunctioning furnace. Seated in the driver’s seat.
Next to this puffing woman, was an elderly woman. Perhaps her mother, her aunt, her grandmother, her neighbor.
Well, I was just shocked. Shocked beyond belief. The very idea to subject that elderly lady to such noxious fumes & chemical poisoning. The elderly lady’s window was up, tightly closed.
Subjecting the elders to such personal bad habits is a poor reflection on that puffing woman. Caring about no one but herself & her addiction to tobacco substance. The elderly have enough health problems without compounding them with another’s personal enjoyment & selfish satisfaction.
Of course, I didn’t bother to approach the puffing woman politely. I kept on going. To offer this black woman puffing a cigarette any cautionary words would have been against Dean’s dictums. Hands off the blacks & their behaviors. Only the whites are to be admonished each time & every time.
02 Nov 2007 at 09:50 pm | #
Anon -(pretend I’m the Dean) keep your stupid criticism to yourself you worthless white piece of shit. You don’t know what it’s like to be black in America and you’re too dumb and poor to understand that you thinking I’m a shitty writer is really code for your racist views, and ultimately speaks of all race issues in the country and the world. And that’s true because I say so. I’m the Dean. But if, by some remote chance, you’re an African American, thanks for the input. Though I am the dean (lower case) I really must be the worst writer if you say so and you have every right to cuss me out for that if you feel it’s necessary. I’ll really try hard to do better.
03 Nov 2007 at 08:59 pm | #
Cincysuz #34, I believe you’ve hit the nail squarely. Great job!
However, dean doesn’t know what it’s like to be black in America, either. He ain’t black. Just because he’s with a black woman, doesn’t give him pass or an understanding. But I’ve always had this inkling that if it were possible, he’d cash out his whiteness to be black. But he’s stuck being white playing black. What a terrible personal affront & a cheap mockery to black people.
04 Nov 2007 at 12:18 am | #
He is not playing black. He is patronizing blacks. The black community doesn’t need him to speak for them, and doesn’t need to be grouped together by him.
His discussion of race baits racists like ‘cincysuz’ and ‘Jones’ into showing their asses for all to see forevermore in the blechosphere.